DEPRESSION CHANGE
EVERYTHING
mainne
is sachchee kahani aur anubhav ko ek kahani ke naam par rakha hai jisane
mujhe is vebasait par prerit kiya.
main
apanee 8 saal kee vartamaan premika ke saath bure daur se gujar raha hoon. 8
saal ek lamba samay hai aur hamaare lie itana kuchh hai. hamane abhee haal hee
mein ek saath ek ghar khareeda hai. christmas se theek pahale. hamaare nae ghar
mein hamaara pahala christmas. sab kuchh bahut achchha chal raha tha. vah
hamaare bhavishy ke lie bahut khush aur utsaahit thee. lekin is baar pichhale
haphte vah achaanak ek depression mein aa gaee ...
usaka
daada hospital mein hai, aur dukh kee baat hai ki vah hamaare saath jyaada
samay tak nahin rah sakata hai. usane pahale hee sveekaar kar liya hai ki yah
vahee hai jisane usaka depression shuroo kiya lekin mujhe baahar kyon band
kiya? mujhe vah vyakti hona chaahie jisase vah kisee bhee cheez ke baare mein
baat kar sake. isake bajaay, use lagata hai ki jab bhee main yah dikhaane kee
koshish karatee hoon ki main usase pyaar karatee hoon aur usakee paravaah
karatee hoon, to vah mujhase napharat aur gussa karatee hai. main kuchh bhee
sahee nahin kah sakata ya kar sakata. jab bhee main usake lie vahaan jaane kee
koshish karata hoon aur main khud ko sveekaar karata hoon ki main apane rishte
ke lie dara hua hoon to vah gussa ho jaatee hai aur mujh par yah sab karane ka
aarop lagaatee hai, jaise ki main tebal ko chaaloo karane kee koshish kar raha
hoon aur use khed mahasoos kar raha hoon main aur main usake lie chinta ke
saath kya kar raha hoon. main use khone se avishvasaneey roop se darata hoon.
main usake bina apane jeevan kee kalpana nahin kar sakata. main usake bina
jeevan nahin chaahata. hamaare paas aane jaane ke lie bahut kuchh hai.
vah
apanee job se napharat karatee hai aur isakee vajah se subah bistar se baahar
nahin nikalana chaahatee. main usake saath madad karane kee koshish kar raha
hoon main bas yah nahin chaahata ki any cheejon ke kaaran vah hamaare beech sab
kuchh phenk de. vah pahale bhee aisa kar chukee hai. use pachhataava hua. vah
mujhase chook gaee aur mere paas vaapas aa gaee. ham tab se itane majaboot
hain. agar main use yaad dilaane kee koshish karata hoon ki usane ek baar
pahale bhee yah galatee kee hai aur main nahin chaahata ki ham phir se gujaren to
vah phir se ud jae! phir se kahata hai ki mujhe apanee paravaah hai. vah saty
nahin hai. main use khone se dar gaya hoon aur main usake baare mein chintit
hoon. usakee man: sthiti. main kisee ko ya kisee bhee cheej kee ummeed nahin
kar sakata, jo mujhe aashvast karane mein saksham ho, main bas ise apane seene
se utaarana chaahata hoon kyonki main isake baare mein usase baat nahin kar
sakata. usane mujhe baahar nikaal diya. main is samay itana kamajor hoon aur
agar mainne usake avasaad mein shaamil kar liya hai to main jaanana chaahata
hoon ki yah kya hai jo mainne kiya hai. mujhe ummeed hai ki bahut der nahin
huee hai. main usase pyaar karata hoon
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